TAKING HONEST ACTION

When asked what sort of goals I have for myself, I usually say, “I want to influence others.” But recently I was challenged to think about how honest I was being with myself about what it meant for me to influence others.

"At some point in your life, you must decide whether you want to impress people or influence people. You can impress them from a distance, but you must get close to influence them and when you do that, they will be able to see your flaws... The most essential quality for leadership is not perfection, but credibility. How do you build credibility? Not by pretending to be perfect, but by being honest."

Part of my overarching goal to influence others was an imaginative ambition to be able to make changes that would benefit large numbers of people, vast groups, sweeping movements. Right up there in policy-making and project planning and management. If I could make a policy that could change structures which in turn alleviated problems, I would be influential. Influential becaues a ‘small’ action on my part would domino into a significant change for a large number of people, hopefully in the direction of improvement.

So I was looking for those sorts of opportunities in the NGO’s, afterall, they have the most potential for influence. In the course of that I realised that it is not so straightforward as to simply walk into a job like that. I lack experience for the jobs, but somehow I managed to convince myself that I could overcome that and score that job.

In facing the challenge, I wondered why I was less than excited to use my skills to teach EFL/ESL as part of relief & development projects. I’ve never intended to teach english. But, right from the start, I was told I was going to acquire a useful mission tool in teaching english. Still, I never once considered that as a serious option for me. I was meant for better and bigger things. How was that going to be influential?

I blurred the line between influence and impressiveness under the facade that I did not want the limelight. But in being honest to myself, I know that my significance to others plays a role in my self-esteem and I feel pretty small when I hear of the big things my peers are getting involved in. Yet, if I were as interested in seeing goals achieved, as result-orientated that I claim to be, it would work well for me to work at grass-root levels so I could make truely tangible changes that I could see and truly influence people in being a christian person - like making an closer impact in teaching bible-study in a growth group than the broad effect as strategising ministry training schemes for regional level OCF; like knowing I have helped children find sponsors and a better life by being part of the WorldVision Australia force and, yes, like teaching english to young people in Japan.