PAY PEANUTS, GET MONKEYS

Week 2 and its already less exhausting. Good sign, yes? Work, smurk. It's nothing at the moment. I'm easing into planning some kick-ass lessons involving Shrek, Donkey, Counting Crows and some IMDB reviews. Don't worry, I have already been adequately forewarned of the mayhem to come. But for now, I'll just enjoy the learning.

And, I just couldn't help but share this sad but true story in Singapore...

A lady died this past January, and City Bank billed her for February and March for their annual service charges on her credit card, and then added late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00, now is somewhere around $60.00.

A family Member placed a call to City Bank:

Family Member: "I am calling to tell you that she died in January."

City Bank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply."

Family Member: "Maybe, you should turn it over to collections."

City Bank: "Since it is two months past due, it already has been."

Family Member: So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?"

City Bank: "Either report her account to the frauds division or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!"

Family Member: "Do you think God will be mad at her?"

City Bank: "Excuse me?"

Family Member: "Did you just get what I was telling you . . . the part about her being dead?"

City Bank: "Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor"

Supervisor gets on the phone:

Family Member: "I'm calling to tell you, she died in January."

City Bank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply."

Family Member: "You mean you want to collect from her estate?"

City Bank: (Stammer) "Are you her lawyer?"

Family Member: "No, I'm her great nephew." (Lawyer info given)

City Bank: "Could you fax us a certificate of death?"

Family Member: "Sure." (fax number is given)

After they get the fax:

City Bank: "Our system just isn't set-up for death. I don't know what more I can do to help."

Family Member: "Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her. I don't think she will care."

City Bank: "Well, the late fees and charges do still apply."

Family Member: "Would you like her new billing address?"

City Bank: "That might help."

Family Member: "Odessa Memorial Cemetery, Highway ---, Plot Number --."

City Bank: "Sir, that's a cemetery!"

Family Member: "What do you do with dead people on your planet?"